You have to be curious about the world in which you live. Look things up. Chase down every reference. Go deeper than anybody else - that’s how you’ll get ahead. (p. 19)

Kleon, A. (2012). Steal Like An Artist. Ten Things Nobody Told You About Being Creative. Workman Publishing Company: New York.

1. DON’T SMOKE CIGARETTES.
2. DRIVE OLD JAPANESE CARS. EASY AND CHEAP TO FIX & THEY RUN FOR FUCKING EVER.
3. BUY MOST OF YOUR GROCERIES FROM THE PRODUCE SECTION. MOST OF THAT OTHER SHIT IS NOT ACTUALLY FOOD. YOU DON’T NEED IT.
4. RIDE YOUR BIKE INSTEAD OF DRIVING AS MUCH AS YOU CAN. YOU NEED THE EXERCISE AND GAS IS EXPENSIVE.
5. DON’T HAVE KIDS. THEY’RE NOT MIRACLES, THEY’RE PEOPLE. 7 BILLION IS TOO FUCKING MANY. FIND SOME OTHER WAY TO GIVE YOUR DULL EXISTENCE SOME MEANING. BTW THEY’RE EXPENSIVE.
6. GET YOUR CLOTHES FROM THRIFT STORES. WITH THE PHYSIQUE YOU’LL HAVE FROM RIDING YOUR BIKE, YOU’LL LOOK HOT WEARING ANYTHING.
7. LEARN TO FIX THINGS. TONS OF GREAT BOOKS AND YOUTUBE VIDS ON FIXING ANYTHING. OR ASK AN OLD DUDE. PEOPLE USED TO FIX THINGS. NO SHIT.
8. LEARN A TRADE —  CARPENTRY, PLUMBING, ELECTRICAL, AUTO MECHANICS, TAILORING, COMPUTER/ELECTRONICS REPAIR, SOMETHING THEY CAN’T FUCKING OUTSOURCE. NO ONE GIVES A SHIT ABOUT YOUR MASTERS IN DOSTOYEVSKY OR YOUR HIGH SCORE ON WORLD OF WARCRAFT…. FIX SOMETHING, DUMBASS, FIX SOMETHING!
9. IF YOU LIKE BOOZE, DRINK AT HOME WITH YOUR NEIGHBORS. DRUNK DRIVING IS FOR ASSHOLES, RICH ONES WITH LAWYERS.
10. DO PEOPLE FAVORS. IT’S CALLED COOPERATION. IT’S HOW THE WORLD WORKED BEFORE MONEY. THEY WILL RETURN THE FAVOR, OR SOMEONE WILL. NO SHIT. THIS REALLY WORKS.
11. MAKE THINGS — LOOK AROUND YOU. WHAT DO YOU SEE? YAH, SHITTY STUFF MADE BY IMPOVERISHED ENSLAVED PEOPLE FAR AWAY. PICK ANYTHING. MAKE A BETTER ONE. PEOPLE WANT GOOD SHIT. YOU WON’T GET RICH, BUT YOU’LL GET BY.
12. IF YOU LIVE IN AMERICA — DON’T GET SICK AND AVOID INJURY. WEAR YOUR FUCKING HELMET AND PUT LIGHTS ON YOUR BIKE.
13. FIND WORK YOU LOVE. IF YOU CAN’T DO THAT, THEN FIND A JOB WHERE YOU LOVE THE PEOPLE.
14. JUNKIES AND ADDICTS ARE LIKE TODDLERS. THEY JUST WANT TO SHIT ALL OVER YOU AND EVERYTHING. THE MESSES THEY MAKE CAN GET EXPENSIVE. AVOID THEM IF YOU CAN.
15. DON’T BUY SHIT ON CREDIT, REMEMBER WHAT HAPPENED TO AMERICA? CASH ONLY, FUCKERS. CAN’T AFFORD IT? DON’T FUCKING BUY IT!
16. PREVENTABLE EXPENSES —  STD’S, ABORTIONS, DWI’S, LUNG CANCER, HEAD INJURIES, SPEEDING TICKETS, CIRRHOSIS OF THE LIVER.
17. DON’T GO ON FANCY DATES IF YOU’RE NOT FANCY. MOST PEOPLE KIND OF DESPISE THE RICH ANYWAY.
18. WHEN YOU GO SEE SHOWS, BRING A FLASK IN. THAT WAY YOU CAN AFFORD TO BUY A RECORD.
19. IF YOU HAD TOLD ME 15 YEARS AGO THAT COCA COLA WOULD PUT TAP WATER IN PLASTIC BOTTLES AND MOTHERFUCKERS WOULD BUY IT …… NO FUCKIN WAY.
20. DON’T GET CABLE. ASSHOLE. THERE IS NOTHING ON. I PROMISE. $100 A MONTH ? FUCK NO!

THIS LIST WAS EDITED BY STACEY YATES WITH CONTRIBUTIONS FROM JHEREK BISHOFF, CHAD RAINES & AMANDA PALMER. WE LIVE IN A WASTEFUL SOCIETY. LIVE WELL. IT DON’T TAKE MUCH. REALLY.

— THOR HARRIS

Wear the uniform
Think long term (like 30 years from now)
Build stories and languages, not things
Create your own universe (or join ours)
Collect samples
Be a sample for somebody else
Look for loyalty, not for a skill set
Do not build utilitarian products. However, use them as a medium to express yourself
Do not exploit introverts — doesn’t work long term. Learn to be an introvert yourself
Travel more
Do not work for corporations. Old corporations were meaningful when their founders were alive, but now, they have outlived their relevancy. They exist only to keep their numbers growing
New corporations are no better. They have scaled up features, and today’s founders want hyper-growth for growth’s sake (it seems like every line of code, every feature deserves its own corporation — it sure doesn’t)
So, fuck the corporations
Tell the truth (bullshit never works long term)
Study and research fashion
Your phone is a temporary feature — don’t spend your life on it (like you wouldn’t spend it on a fax machine)
Fuck likes, followers, fake lives, fake friends
Remake your environment. Build it for yourself, and people will come
Only trust those who make things you love
Move to LA
Don’t buy property
Don’t go to Mars (just yet)
Use only one font, just a few colors, and just a few shapes
Use spreadsheets, but only to map out 30 cells — one for each year of the rest of your life
The next three are the most important
The past doesn’t exist — don’t get stuck in it
Don’t go to Silicon Valley (it’s not for you if you’re still reading this)
Remind yourself daily: you and everyone you know will die
We must build the most beautiful things
We are 2046 kids

1. There are plenty of ways to enter a pool. The stairs is not one of them.

2. Never cancel dinner plans by text message.

3. Don’t knock it ’til you try it.

4. If a street performer makes you stop walking, you owe him a buck.

5. Always use ‘we’ when referring to your home team or your government.

6. When entrusted with a secret, keep it.

7. Don’t underestimate free throws in a game of ‘horse’.

8. Just because you can doesn’t mean you should.

9. Don’t dumb it down.

10. You only get one chance to notice a new haircut.

11. If you’re staying more than one night, unpack.

12. Never park in front of a bar.

13. Expect the seat in front of you to recline. Prepare accordingly.

14. Keep a picture of your first fish, first car, and first boy/girlfriend.

15. Hold your heroes to a high standard.

16. A suntan is earned, not bought.

17. Never lie to your doctor.

18. All guns are loaded.

19. Don’t mention sunburns. Believe me, they know.

20. The best way to show thanks is to wear it. Even if it’s only once.

21. Take a vacation of your cell phone, internet, and TV once a year.

22. Don’t fill up on bread, no matter how good.

23. A handshake beats an autograph.

24. Don’t linger in the doorway. In or out.

25. If you choose to go in drag, don’t sell yourself short.

26. If you want to know what makes you unique, sit for a caricature.

27. Never get your hair cut the day of a special event.

28. Be mindful of what comes between you and the Earth. Always buy good shoes, tires, and sheets.

29. Never eat lunch at your desk if you can avoid it.

30. When you’re with new friends, don’t just talk about old friends.

31. Eat lunch with the new kids.

32. When traveling, keep your wits about you.

33. It’s never too late for an apology.

34. Don’t pose with booze.

35. If you have the right of way, take it.

36. You don’t get to choose your own nickname.

37. When you marry someone, remember you marry their entire family.

38. Never push someone off a dock.

39. Under no circumstances should you ask a woman if she’s pregnant.

40. It’s not enough to be proud of your ancestry; live up to it.

41. Don’t make a scene.

42. When giving a thank you speech, short and sweet is best.

43. Know when to ignore the camera.

44. Never gloat.

45. Invest in good luggage.

46. Make time for your mom on your birthday. It’s her special day, too.

47. When opening presents, no one likes a good guesser.

48. Sympathy is a crutch, never fake a limp.

49. Give credit. Take blame.

50. Suck it up every now and again.

51. Never be the last one in the pool.

52. Don’t stare.

53. Address everyone that carries a firearm professionally.

54. Stand up to bullies. You’ll only have to do it once.

55. If you’ve made your point, stop talking.

56. Admit it when you’re wrong.

57. If you offer to help don’t quit until the job is done.

58. Look people in the eye when you thank them.

59. Thank the bus driver.

60. Never answer the phone at the dinner table.

61. Forgive yourself for your mistakes.

62. Know at least one good joke.

63. Don’t boo. Even the ref is somebody’s son.

64. Know how to cook one good meal.

65. Learn to drive a stick shift.

66. Be cool to younger kids. Reputations are built over a lifetime.

67. It’s okay to go to the movies by yourself.

68. Dance with your mother/father.

69. Don’t lose your cool. Especially at work.

70. Always thank the host.

71. If you don’t understand, ask before it’s too late.

72. Know the size of your boy/girlfriend’s clothes.

73. There is nothing wrong with a plain t-shirt.

74. Be a good listener. Don’t just wait for your turn to talk.

75. Keep your word.

76. In college, always sit in the front. You’ll stand out immediately.

77. Carry your mother’s bags. She carried you for nine months.

78. Be patient with airport security. They’re just doing their jobs.

79. Don’t be the talker in a movie.

80. The opposite sex likes people who shower.

81. You are what you do, not what you say.

82. Learn to change a tire.

83. Be kind. Everyone has a hard fight ahead of them.

84. An hour with grandparents is time well spent. Ask for advice when you need it.

85. Don’t litter.

86. If you have a sister, get to know her boyfriend. Your opinion is important.

87. You won’t always be the strongest or the fastest. But you can be the toughest.

88. Never call someone before 9am or after 9pm.

89. Buy the orange properties in Monopoly.

90. Make the little things count.

91. Always wear a bra at work.

92. There is a fine line between looking sultry and slutty. Find it.

93. You’re never too old to need your mom.

94. Ladies, if you make the decision to wear heels on the first date, commit to keeping them on and keeping your trap shut about how much your feet kill.

95. Know the words to your national anthem.

96. Your dance moves might not be the best, but I promise making a fool of yourself is more fun then sitting on the bench alone.

97. Smile at strangers.

98. Make goals.

99. Being old is not dictated by your bedtime.

100. If you have to fight, punch first and punch hard